There’s a silence in the heart of the night,
A hollow, heavy ache that knows my name,
Where dreams once rose like stars, bold and right,
But now flicker, fading, sinking to shame.
I’m standing here, my shoulders bent and worn,
Lost in shadows too deep for me to explain.
I fear for the health of those not yet born,
And for those I love, pulled close by my pain.
I wonder if I’ve failed them all somehow.
Do they see the cracks I try hard to hide?
My sons, so young, do they see me now
Through eyes I’ve dimmed with truths pushed aside?
I’m scared that I’ve tainted all they know,
Their innocence brushed by my wounded strain,
As my anger spills out, unbidden, slow,
And paints our home with something shaped by pain.
I fear my days may end too soon to see
The faces of grandchildren yet to come,
To hold their hands, show who I long to be
Instead of this worn soul I’ve now become.
The load grows heavy, my heart thinned within,
And I wonder how much more I can bear.
The road keeps darkening, yet here I’m in,
Too solid to shatter, too numb to despair.
But somewhere in these shadows, I still hope
For strength to lift this weight from my chest,
To be a father, a friend, to cope
With what I’ve lost and all the rest.