Dear Mr. Mann – Bang Energy

Dear Bang Energy,

You’re the best part of my day.

You make sleepiness go away.

I hope that you will stay.

I’m writing just to say hey.

But seriously, I love Bang Energy. Nothing gets me going like a can of Rainbow Unicorn or Radical Skadattle. It’s amazing how well it works for me. I don’t feel hyped up or jittery, just… awake and alert. I work for a software company building web apps for clients, and I’m happy to say that all the apps I build are powered by Bang.

A couple of weeks ago, I ran out of Bang and I tried a competitor (please forgive me, I’m so sorry) and it just wasn’t the same. Sure, I was alert, but I felt jittery and weird. Plus the flavor I picked tasted super chemically, kind of like chewing on a latex glove. I regretted my decision and ran out to Costco for more Bang and all was right with the world again.

Anyway, thanks for keeping millions of GenXers and Millenials like myself caffeinated and moving. Life is tough, but Bang makes it easier.

Never. Change.