Dearest Costco,
It’s a running joke in my family that Costco is like Disney World, but for adults. I can’t tell you how many great afternoons I’ve had to wander around my local Costco enjoying looking at… well… stuff. My dog has Costco toys, my son wears Costco pants, I drink Kirkland Signature sparkling water like it’s going out of style, and I even convinced my dad to buy Costco hearing aids. I dream of Costco at night, and I browse the Costco subreddit on Reddit during the day. My favorite piece of mail that I get each month is the big rectangular Costco ad and I build my shopping list based on what’s on sale. The tires on my car came from Costco, the windshield wipers too. When a friend from out of town visits, one that isn’t blessed with a Costco near them, they get taken out for a slice of Costco pizza. I watch that scene from Modern Family where Cam takes Mitchell to Costco for the first time on a weekly basis. However, all that being said, I draw the line at getting a Costco tattoo… That’s just weird.
Anyway, I wanted to write to you about my love for you. Other than my wife and my son, you’re the love of my life. Please never change.
Sincerely,
A Big Fan (James)